Momofuku Ssam - No, I'm not cursing at you
207 Second Ave NY NY 1003
212-254-3500
http://www.momofuku.com/

I ate here once before with someone as payment for doing a service for them.

Ummm anyway, I had such a good meal that time that I was looking for an excuse to go back. What better excuse than my wife not wanting to cook on a Thursday night (6/21/07). Unfortunately, the weather man lied and it was raining when I got outside instead of being clear like he told me in the morning. Added to this fact, my spoiled rotten wife was trying to convince me to cab it from 57th and 6th to 13th and 2nd...the cab would cost more than the dinner. So I forced her to take the subway - as I do every single day - and we made our way to 13th and 6th. In a supremely benevolent act of compassion - being the wonderful husband I am - I allowed us to cab it from there to the restaurant.

We got there about 5:30 or so and it looked crowded. I was sure there'd be a wait but when we got inside they immediately sat us at the bar. The place has a long bar and near the end closest to the entrance, it is a wrap-around situation so you and your friends can face each other and enjoy the meal. The rest of the bar is typical setup with diners lined up a few inches from each other and the servers on the other side. There are tables on the right-hand side running to the back. There was a group of Japanese business people having a nice dinner in the back.

I kicked things off by ordering a 750ml bottle of house Sake. Work has been busy for both of us lately, and what better way to unwind than to destroy the very brain cells that contain the offending memories of my job than by drinking Sake. I could swear I ordered a 750ml bottle with the hobo I ate with at this place last time, but it looked a lot bigger this time - oh well! Sounds like a good problem to have to me!

I decided to order a sampler of sorts since I wasn't sure when we'd be back. Hamachi, 2 orders of steamed pork buns, sugar snap peas, Ssam Momofuku , bread and butter and 2 different desserts. What? That's just how I do it - living like "I don't have a mortgage" style.

The hamachi is very nice and fresh tasting. Just the clean, delicate taste of the fish with some edamame, horseradish and pea leaves. The pea leaves are bitter and I like the combination of bitter greens and sweet fish. I like the liquor Campari for the same reason. (SIDENOTE: Mister Softee keeps driving by outside my house...why won't he stop so that I can buy a small vanilla sundae with rainbow sprinkles....)

The sugar snaps come next. Fresh, firm pea-pods with a broth of porky goodness. Small bits of ham cover the peas. Delicious, but for some reason I can't eat them all. Probably a defense mechanism so that I don't get full and can enjoy the rest of the food to come. These will make a great side for lunch tomorrow I'm thinking. Much better than that crap that everyone at work usually orders from the rat and corpse infested lunch places along 56th and such.

The server brought the plate of God's perfect food next - 2 orders of steamed pork buns. These things are insanely good. Perfectly steamed, sticky buns cut in half and filled with two perfect, meaty pieces of the best pork, some small cucumber, scallions and a sweet hoison sauce. I gobbles down one (I write like Golem speaks), let her have two and promised we would wrap up the fourth and she could have that as a 'midnight snacker'.

I ordered the bread and butter at some point in the middle and they brought a hot and crusty baguette and two types of soft butter. One was a sea salt butter and the other was some English goat butter. Awesome. They brought out the Ssam Momofuku - the original version of their burrito-type dish. Flour pancake, rice, bershire pork, onions, edamame, pickled shitake and red kimchi puree. Don't even try to sit there as you read this and say this doesn't sound amazing. It tastes just as good as it sounds. Here was my nefarious strategy. I had two bites, let her eat the rest and then took one half home and ate that for lunch the next day. (The following night she asked where the other half went and I said "I ate it for lunch" - I know she wanted to kill me in my sleep).

For dessert I knew she'd want the Mochi. First of all, she loves mochi in general. Second, I have been bragging about the mochi at this place since the last time I came to eat here with that assassin. They told me they buy it from some Hawaii-based company. I think I bought the same stuff from Whole Foods and it really is that good. So she got that - strawberry (great), mango (great), pistachio (awesome) and chocolate (ehhh). I ordered Strawberry Short Cake. WOW. Simple and delicious...two small slightly sweet biscuits covered in fresh strawberries and cream. Much better than that cake garbage most bakeries try to pass off as SSC.

I think I will go back to this place. If anyone wants to go with me, just let me know. I assume you are paying. Total damage for us was $156 with tax and tip. The sake was $38, most dishes cost around $10. I regret not ordering the off menu crab cakes. I'm sure they would have been great.

Awkward without Gordon

Gordon Ramsay portrays himself on his TV shows as the most demanding of chefs and restaurant owners in terms of food quality, presentation and service. The guy has several 3-star Michelin restaurants and is very successful. How could I go wrong at his NYC location? But I'm getting ahead of myself and giving you too much sense that things aren't all that I expected them to be.

You enter the London hotel and take a right into the diner...I mean the London Bar. It just looks like a diner. It is sort of confusing because I guess they also have another restaurant called Maze. So you have the bar, Maze and the formal Gordon Ramsay dining room. We sat and I ordered water and wife order...uh-oh...TEA!! Tea is usually ordered at the end of the meal, but she likes tea so she ordered it as her pre-dinner drink. Who cares? Just shut up, don't ask us if we are sure we want tea and bring the damn tea! If she wants to drink tea like some psycho with every course of her meal, who cares? We got there 20 minutes before 5:30 (Saturday, 6/16/07), so I figured I could drink my water and her the tea before dinner...but then the woman comes and seats us at 5:20. OK.

So my wife calms down a bit when she realizes that the formal dining room is nicer than the diner outside. It is mirrored and dim inside. People walking their dogs pass by the windows and gawk. How cool. The first waiter comes by and comments how it is strange to drink tea now because that's usually at the end of the meal - actually, I think it was the same server from the diner part. Fortunately they quickly banished her back to the diner where she belonged. My server came over - a youngish female from Russia I think - somewhere in eastern Europe - either from a country that appreciates the USA building a missile defense system in their country or from one that thinks it is a sign of war and threatens to redirect their nukes at our allies. She was nice enough and I felt bad when I asked her to get a gentleman to push my wife's seat closer. She responded with glee that she was strong enough to do it herself. I'm not a sexist, but I just didn't want her to have to do it - good for her, more power to her. Also, I didn't do it myself because that would be a little odd. I'm serious - when you go to a place like this and pay this kind of money, these people are at your beck and call! Thats the whole point.

So we decided to go with the Menu Prestige (tasting menu) and we were going to get wine. They don't have an official wine pairing list, but the Sommelier insists that he will pick half-glasses for each course for some undisclosed price. Great...I love getting price raped. So things seemed to start off well enough with the amuse bouche. A mushroom based morsel, goat cheese on a cracker and a wonton with some seafood inside. All very nice. Not excellent but nice. Gives you a sense of the level this place is operating at.

One thing that kind of gave me another foreboding sense that Gordon still has some work to do here - they left the door open to the dining room so I could hear the clubbish music to Maze (the casual room) outside. I don't want to see those people or hear their music. I wanted to be transported out of the reality of my life to someplace else where I am rich enough to own my own fossilized dinosaur eggs and a collection of medieval weapons. So I asked a manager type if the door would be closed for dinner and he said yes, but he looked at me like I asked him to cut out his liver and wrap it up to take home for my cats. He went over and did it but I didn't appreciate his attitude.

After this was a sorbet on a watermelon and blood orange salad. Very fresh and a nice cleanser. First course was tiny portions of foie gras with chicken and truffled quails egg. All very nice. It's 3 little portions...the little one with FG and chicken was the best. The quail's egg was ok. I couldn't help but thinking back to a recent episode of Man Vs.Wild where Bear at a whole raven's egg, shell and all! The wine was very nice as well. I'll cut to the chase and say that all the wine was OK except for one really outstanding one - more on that later.

The ravioli of tiger prawn with fennel cream was nice. I wish it was a little more substantial, but the flavors were very nice. The pasta was well made and the prawn was fresh and delicious. I thought the fennel cream went very well with the pasta. Next was baked fluke with almond crust and champagne veloute. It sounds awesome - I love almonds and the taste they bring to food. This was so bland and forgettable. I ate it and experienced nothing. It wasn't bad by any means - it just wasn't anything fantastic. I come to a place like this and demand that every course be a burst of flavors in my mouth and a wonderful experience...nothing should be dull.

The next courses, the meats, began redeeming the place. My wife's pork dish was phenomenal. One piece was like high-end bacon and the other was a piece in minted peas. Awesome flavors and very fresh tasting bacon. Meaty and just the right amount of fattiness and crispiness. Vegetarians who don't eat meat because they think it is cruel are sad. Yes, Ive seen slaughterhouse footage and I don't care - God told me himself that he wanted me to eat all the pigs in the world. Yes, he did. I ordered the cannon of lamb with crusted potatoes. I heard it was Gardon's signature dish so I asked the server. Look, if I'm wrong tell me I'm wrong, but dont look at me like a monkey and grin and say you aren't sure and that maybe it is his signature dish. Go find out and let me know. Jeez. Anyway, it was very good. The wine that wifey got with her pork was EXCELLENT - Rioja Riserva 2000 'Vina Alberdi' by La Rioja Alta. It had such a unique smell and taste unlike anything I had before.

So I saw the dessert trolley and wanted it closer to me. I love dessert trolleys. I like that you can get as much as you want and try to make up for how much you are paying at these places. But our server smiled and said that Monsieur (me) was getting too anxious and dessert was first. Out came her caramelized pienapple with crystallized cilantro - she said it tasted like baby food. I had more fun picking 5 cheeses with the server - he helped me made some delicious selections that I had never tried before. Goat cheese, hard cheese, , strong, mild and a blue cheese. All wonderful. I thought this was my dessert, but I was happily mistaken. However, the break between cheese and dessert was LONGGGGG so I can be forgiven for thinking it was over. They cleared the table and no one seemed to notice us. Our table was right in the center and they just seemed to go around us. very annoying.

Finally came our chocolate desserts - it was a delicious chocolate fondant with a creme de menthe flavor. Excellent - my wife didnt like it so I ate her's too. I ordered some coffee. The pitcher with the cream was so friggin hot! Why was it hot?!? I didnt say anything but I almost burnt my hand pouring it. I wanted to throw it at the person who prepared it and injure them. Why would the cream for my coffee be hot?? That makes no sense. Then again, this place is so awkward that I shouldn't be surprised.

Finally came the dessert trolley with the nice guy who did my cheeses. We picked one of everything and it was all pretty good. We asked for more little candies. They brought them. I asked for a copy of the menu and Jean Baptiste brought it in a nice purple bag. Overall, this place isn't 3-stars yet. The food isn't there yet and while the people seem eager in some sense, it seems to be all movement and no action. It's all very awkward - it isn't natural. They need more time. I'm sure it will continue to improve but when you are going to charge these prices, I want it flawless from get go. I can go to many other places, pay this price and get excellent everything. With tax and tip, the damage was $444. Turns out the wine prices weren't so bad. I suggest going somewhere else, probably spending less and getting a better experience. Come back here when Gordon is in the kitchen and on top of things or next year perhaps.

Dinner as an 'Enemy of the State'
http://danielnyc.com/daniel/main.html

I read somewhere that when you dine at Daniel, the reason the staff can almost anticipate your every need is that they have cameras in the ceiling so that the staff can always see you. I spent a lot of time looking for the cameras on Friday evening (6/15/07) but didn't see any surveillance equipment. I did however think the interior of the was one of the most beautiful I had ever seen. It was very formal and not exactly the type of place I could be truly comfortable, but it was still beautiful in its detail and design.

Daniel was one of the remaining places on my list of top NYC restaurants and I have to say it did not disappoint. We entered the revolving doors into a dimly lit, elegant lobby. I walked my wife down the small staircase as the hostess beaconed us over. Dinner service had not started yet, so we were seated in the bar area. I sat on what felt like a velvet covered chair and tried to act casual and comfortable. For someone like me, for whom these types of dining experiences are splurges and not really natural, effortless affairs, it is a little hard to ever be comfortable. I have to say that the bar service wasn't as good as I expected. It was downright slow. There weren't many other couples in the bar area but it seemed to take forever for my wife and I to receive our drinks. They arrived and after one or two sips, we were told that we could go to the dining room. I thought the dining area was in a room immediately to the right of the bar but instead we were brought back to the hostess station and into a much larger and grand room.

We were seated at a table on the side and I was very pleased with this - a great view of the main floor and private. There was only one table that looked better and it was a corner booth draped off with its own special decor and a view of the entire restaurant. Very VIP - not me. We were given the menu and wine list and after a quick glance, we decided that the best way to make this easy and enjoyable was to go with the tasting menu and accompanying wine. In retrospect, while I think that the wine accompaniment is a great way to go in terms of getting to try a lot of different wines, it also goes straight to your head and alters your perception of the courses. Keep that in mind if you want to be at 100% in terms of being able to appreciate the food.

The meal began with a small silver tower with small tastings of goat cheese, asparagus, salmon and something that I can no longer remember. All very good, fresh flavors. You go to places like Daniel because you'd probably never take the time at home to make little things like these, but they are such a wonderful way to start dinner and get a sense of the quality and care that is put into the meal and experience.

We decided that my wife would pick each selection for her six courses and I would receive the alternate choice. This way, she was in charge (not often that this happens when I'm around) and happy ( hmm, hopefully she is happy most of the time, but who cares if she isn't!) and we got to try everything on the menu.

Regarding the comment I made on service in the bar area, service in the main dining room was 180 degrees different. Service is impeccable. The staff is pleasant and natural in execution of their job. Their job is to make me happy and make the whole dining experience an utter pleasure for me - and that they did. Knowledgeable, efficient and accommodating. When my wife enjoyed the bing cherry with her foie gras and demanded two more - one for her and one for me - they brought them out expeditiously. When I insisted they were marinated in something and the server at first said no, when he came back he apologized and corrected himself and informed me they were. That means he inquired back in the kitchen - good for him and it made me happy.

So first course for her was that foie gras and at first she thought my ballotine of duck with glazed peaches and spcied pistachios was better. However, at a few bites of her foie gras and my insistence, she realized how this was some of the highest quality foie gras we had ever had and that it was wonderful beyond my delicious ballotine. The wine, like every subsequent wine pairing, was perfect. Honestly, I can't remember specifics, but my memories are that we were in ecstasy at how each one was a wonderful and pleasing experience.

Second courses: her peektoe crab salad was nice, but I prefered my trio of trout was superior - more below. The TV show 'Deadliest Catch' has given me a newfound respect and appreciation for what was already my favorite seafood and her dish represented the best you can get when the food is so separated from its ultimate freshness after those guys catch it. Perhaps my trout was better because a piece of my trout was wrapped in God's perfect food - bacon. After my experience with trout at Aquavit, I have come to enjoy this fish a lot more.

Third, was tortellini with serrano ham and chanterelles. I must admit, I am always skeptical of non-Italians being able to execute pasta. I know it is silly but it is just something in my head that I never want to order pasta if it is not a Batali joint. But I had no choice here and it was wonderful. She had the Crayfish with porcinis and that was also very good. Just in case you are wondering, the wines continued to be unique and highly enjoyable. Like I said, my head was probably really spinning by this point, so I can only remember being very happy in general - nothing specific. I was trying to focus on the food. Service continued to be amazing and we were still enthralled by the decor - the place really is that beautiful. If you want to get laid, take your date here. If I was a hobo or a runaway child, I'd hide in Daniel because it is just a beautiful location. The bathrooms, which I always enjoy inspecting at nice restaurants, was espespecially nice smelling and well decorated.

Fourth, main seafood dish was yellowfin tuna for her and halibut with fresh vegetables for me. Both very good but I had a lot of seafood by this point. Next came a duo of beef for her and lamb for me. Okay, here is one flaw. She requested her beef to be medium rare but closer to medium. Apparently it was too rare for her, so she chewed it and spit it out. I ate the rest because it was perfect for me. I informed a server when he took the plate that the reason there was a small lump of chewed meat was that it wasn't cooked to my wife's liking. I expected the server to go into the kitchen and detonate the vest on his chest, but he just seemed to nod his head at me. I should have pressed the seriousness of the issue more, but my wife didn't seem to care much and I had eaten the rest of the meat. She did the same thing at Smith and Wolensky years ago and I realize that she just doesn't know how beef is supposed to be cooked. But honestly, a place like this should bring her charred ash of beef if that is what she wants. Next time I'm going to create a hostage situation if they don't cook it the way she wants. JUST KIDDING FBI!!!

Finally, was dessert. She seemed to enjoy her caramelized banana and I sort of enjoyed my chocolate praline cremeux. For chocolate to really win me over it has to be done just right. This was just like every other high-end French place chocolate dessert. A long rectangle of chocolate with a chocolate ribbon on top. I'm sure it was representative of the height of chocolate dessertiring (not a real word) but I thought it was just ok. She ate her banana dish quickly so I assume it was very good. Looking at the menu, I should have ordered the cheese platter too - next time I guess.

So, overall, Daniel is a fantastic place. The total bill with tax and tip for 2 tasting menus and wine pairing was $632. I was there for about 3 hours. Her, it's how I like to spend my time and money. I don't like going away - I get very anxious when I leave NYC - so I like wasting all of my money going to absurdly expensive restaurants. When I'm older I'll be so poor that I'll have to eat cat food, or my cats. But in the meantime, I highly recommend Daniel for the impeccable food, service and decor.

A car wash to support our country
http://www.patriotbattalion.com/

I was out driving today and saw a sign for 'Patriot Battalion Car Wash.' I went over and saw it was the local high school's ROTC program raising money with a car wash fund raiser. I have seen the kids on the bus in their uniforms and always thought it was great that are still some young kids that believe in this country and are willing to do something like that. I know with all of the negativity towards the military and towards the country in general that they probably hear from the media that it must be hard for them. I'm sure they also get grief from other kids, and who knows, maybe even anti-military family members. So I went to talk with the Master Sergeant in charge of the event and he told me that the school has about 4,500 kids and about 500 are in the ROTC! It is one of the largest on the east coast and they win a lot of drill competitions. Many of the kids go on to West Point and get scholarships. Several are first generation to the country. He tracks them after graduation and many report back to him that college is weird because the kids smoke, do drugs and drink a lot and they aren't used to that way of living. I told him that it was a shame the media doesnt report on these positive things and he said that when he asks the media to an event, none of the papers show up. It makes me sick that the media only wants to report on Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton and everyone thinks that the youth of this country and are losers. Meanwhile our kids only see those images and hear those stories and think that's the way to live life. Im sure most parents want their kids to be strong and good but most are probably so brainwashed by the liberal, anti-USA left that they would never think to encourage their kids to join ROTC programs. It made me so proud to see all of those kids out on a Saturday doing this. It was $5 and I gave them a $10 tip. The seargent said the school gives them some money and the government some, but the govt said if they had to fund all the ROTC programs, it would have to sacrifice a batallion. I dont think we should do that, but we should cut funding for some idiotic left wing programs and fund the ROTC programs. Does the government not understand that without these programs the military is losing out on some of its most promising candidates? Stop sending aid to countries that don't appreciate our generosity and fund all of the ROTC programs. As my good friend said: "The only reason this country can afford the luxury of such a strong education system is beacause of our military superiority." I second his statement by saying that the one of the primary reasons we can live in such a great country and live the relatively good lives we do is because of our military superiority. Many people around the world would love to destroy this country and everything we have. You're delusional if you think that we can pander and negotiate our way to world peace.

http://www.patriotbattalion.com/